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MOVIE REVIEW

Tomb Raider XXX: An Exquisite Films Parody

Released: Mar 05th, 2012
Running Time: 240 Min.
Director: Jordan Septo
Company: Paradox Pictures
Distribution Companies: Exquisite Films
DVD Extras: Behind the Scenes, Cumshot Recap, Still Gallery(ies)
Cast: Anthony Rosano, Nicole Aniston, Chanel Preston, Gracie Glam, Kagney Linn Karter, Lea Lexis, Danny Mountain, Lee Stone, Evan Stone, Derrick Pierce, Dani Daniels
Critical Rating: AAAA
Genre: Parody - Drama

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SYNOPSIS

The greatest thrill seeker of our lifetime, Lara Croft, is headed on the adventure of her lifetime. With Alister in her ear, she searches for artifacts around the world and battles the sinister members of Natla Technologies at every turn. But forever the thrill seeker, this death defying journey is not enough to quench her insatiable quest for excitement. Only when she falls into the arms of her allies and enemies for torrid encounters can she be satisfied.

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REVIEWS

 

Critical Rating: AAAA

There isn’t a guy under the age of 40 who didn’t want a shot at fucking Lara Croft. And now that Chanel Preston has brought the video game character to life in this porn parody, there’s not a guy alive who won’t want their shot at that.

Jordan Septo directed Tomb Raider XXX, which takes its cue more from the live action movies than the original video game. Lara (Preston) is contracted by Lee Stone to search for part of an ancient relic, but unbeknownst to her the relic is the final piece of a bigger puzzle that carries with it supernatural powers. Though Stone pays a lot of money for her services, Preston also decides to thank him in a more personal way: by sucking his cock until she gags and then having him plow her like an open field.

Lea Lexis, who is actually behind Preston’s search for the artifact, has to explain to Derrick Pierce that while he is fully capable of finding all of the pieces, she needs him to focus on proving his loyalty and stamina to her by allowing her to alternately ride his face and his cock until she cums with pleasure, he all the while smacking her ass to make it a bright shade of red. The sex is a little on the rough side, but nothing too extreme aside from some spanking and a little light slapping on both parts.

After Lara sets out on her adventure and does some rock climbing in Peru, with the voice of her faithful companion Alastair (Anthony Rosano) in her earpiece, she finds the relic and in turn quickly finds out she has been double-crossed. Her quest for revenge takes her to Egypt, where she is arrested, but trusted friend Amanda (Kagney Linn Karter) is willing to do whatever it takes to free Croft, including taking on the double team of guards Evan Stone and Danny Mountain.

Once escaped, Preston finds herself passed out and dehydrated in the desert, but thankfully is rescued by the sheik’s wives (Gracie Glam and Dani Daniels). In an effort to show her appreciation, Preston eats their pussies and finger-fucks them both to climax.

Her final confrontation with Lexis gives Croft and viewers the real purpose behind the relic, and an explosive finish (literally).

For good measure, Preston presents Rosano with a thank you for all his hard work in the form of Nicole Aniston, and he wastes no time in enjoying the fruits of his labor.

Though the plot is a little convoluted at times, the sex scenes and the bonus material on a second disc (including a cumshot recap and behind-the-scenes footage) definitely make up for it.


 

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Anthony Rosano
Nicole Aniston
Chanel Preston
Gracie Glam
Kagney Linn Karter
Lea Lexis
Danny Mountain
Lee Stone
Evan Stone
Derrick Pierce
Dani Daniels
Jordan Septo

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