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Barely Blue Velvet: A XXX Parody

Released: Feb 26th, 2013
Running Time: 125 Min.
Director: Jason Danilak
Companies: Pearl Productions, Real Productions
Distribution Companies: Pulse
DVD Extras: Bonus Scenes, Outtakes, Still Gallery(ies)
Cast: Cytherea, Seth Gamble, Eric John, Vicki Chase, Sammie Spades, Alura Jenson, Paul Carpenter, Tasha Reign, Sonny Hicks
Non-sex Roles: Paul Carpenter, Cassidy Exe
Critical Rating: AAAA
Genre: Parody - Drama

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In this parody of the cinematic masterpiece "Blue Velvet," Jeffrey Beaumont (Seth Gamble) realizes his hometown isn't as normal as it looks when he discovers a severed penis in a field near his house. His investigation leads him into a world of S&M and depraved sex acts involving a mysterious night club singer (Sammie Spades) and a helium-snorting sadist (Eric John). Jeffrey's only ally is Sandy (Tasha Reign), a detective's daughter who may hold the key to both the case and Jeffrey's sanity.

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Critical Rating: AAAA

Though this parody won’t be to everyone’s taste, arguably one could say that the world is more complete now that there’s a sexually explicit homage to Blue Velvet, David Lynch’s über-creepy 1986 psychodrama. As in the original, the plot is set in motion with the discovery of a body part—but here it’s a severed penis. Jeffrey (babyfaced Seth Gamble) makes the discovery and takes it to Detective Williams (Riddick Solaris), but he can’t shake his curiosity. With the help of Williams’ daughter (girl-next-door Tasha Reign), Jeffrey delves into the mystery and is soon drawn into the drama surrounding a nightclub singer (Sammie Spades) whose mate has been kidnapped by the villainous Frank.

Eric John inhabits the role of Frank, a psychopathic presence created by Dennis Hopper in the original. Opaque and menacing, he inhales helium through a gas mask, turning his voice into a spooky falsetto.

Though the moodiness of the source material at times overwhelms the eroticism, there’s a generous amount of hardcore action here. Gamble and Reign enjoy some vanilla sex; Gamble gets to watch while John bangs Spades and wraps what looks like blue satin (what, no velvet?) around his dick; and then he eventually gets to fuck Spades himself twice—once in a threesome with Cytherea. And along the way there’s footage of John and Vicki Chase, purportedly shot on Frank’s wedding night, and a tawdry twosome with Frank’s henchman (Sonny Hicks) and a slut named Trixie (Alura Jenson).

Overall, director Jason Danilak provides good banging for the buck. The desert landscapes and seedy motels and apartments are a nice change of pace from the usual porno mansions, with camera and light courtesy of Martin Scoreseasy (hyuk, hyuk).


Related Content:

Pearl Productions
Real Productions
Tasha Reign
Eric John
Sammie Spades
Sonny Hicks
Seth Gamble
Vicki Chase
Alura Jenson
Paul Carpenter
Jason Danilak
Cassidy Exe
Paul Carpenter


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