Don't Watch This Movie

Released: Jan 01st, 2001
Running Time: 87
Director: Derek Newblood
Company: Armageddon
Distribution Companies: Extreme Associates
Cast: Anastasia Blue, Luciano (I), Suzanne Storm, Brandon Iron, Bridget Powerz, Kno Malone, Brian Surewood, Tom Byron, Kristi Myst, Jay Ashley
Critical Rating: AAAA
Genre: All-Sex

SYNOPSIS

The title may draw 'em in, but that Myst scene may also draw controversy.

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How about Watch Parts of This Movie?

Inconsistent with a slapdash feel and little visual style, this five-scener nonetheless contains just enough hot moments to squeak by with a marginally above-average rating.

Those parts actually worth viewing include the opener - a well-energized Anastasia Blue/Tom Byron gaping-anal number - and scene four, in which Suzanne Storm gets sandwiched between Brian Surewood and Jay Ashley, then is force-fed an actual cum sandwich.

But the tape's most watchable sequence is the blasphemous (hey, this is an Armageddon production) closer, in which Kristi Myst's full-on nun gets assaulted by three brutes in a real church, d.p.'d, triple-penetrated, then face-frosted while clutching a crucifix to her extremely comely kisser.

The vid's middle two scenes, routine hetero threeways featuring, respectively, Kno Malone and Bridget "The Midget" Powerz, are strictly fast-forwardable. But Rob Black's ranting intros are fairly entertaining, even if his unabashed hype leads one to conclude he shouldn't quit his day job to become an AVN reviewer.