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Released: May 01st, 1995
Running Time: 78
Directors: John T Bone, John T. Bone
Company: Fantastic Pictures
Cast: Umma, Skye Blue, Summer Cummings, Annabel Chong, Jonathan Morgan, Ron Jeremy
Critical Rating: AAAA
I am in the midst of a video reviewer's worst dilemma. The Problem: how do you justify assigning an AAAA rating to a video that is not "politically correct" as compared to what is considered 'The Norm' for productions rated AAAA or better? Nothing in it is mainstream, glossy, expected, and it certainly does not feature the usual performers in the prerequisite number of mixed scenes of formula flicks. My only humble answer is, "I enjoyed the hell out of it!"
Hype like "dares to be different" means nothing here as I suspect that the director (John T. Bone) long ago found it unnecessary to have to prove that he is willing to take the road less travelled. Intermixed between three outrageous fantasy sex scenes is an animated, humorous plot that parodies and lampoons adult video sacred cows like contract girls (that analogy alone gives you an idea of the theme of this one). It also takes some illiberal stabs at the big companies known for employing gals with reformed forms, beepers, cars, and sensual eagerness to keep their bosses well (ahem!) satisfied.
Annabel Chong, not exactly mainstream herself, appears at the offices of "Livid Video" in search of work making fuck films. Jonathan Morgan, the boss, is quick to point out that they make ARTISTIC films - and the word "fuck" nearly causes the nearby contract girls to swoon in embarrassment. Also, being Asian, she is too ethnic to fit in. Annabel and Jonathan have a ball dueling with delightfully hysterical puns and exaggerated over-acting. Summer Cummings and Skye Blue are the contract girls. They have a non-sexual and non-nude role (whatta waste!). These always-together ladies act like easily offended stuck-up broads. The absurdity of the situation is enhanced by the fact that they both are barely recognizable behind stoic porcelain face masks. In fact, their entire costume, vocabulary, and mannerisms purposefully imitate the coppertop battery commercials.
"Livid Video's" request for her ideal sex scene begins Annabel's visionary fantasy as she and Umma are on a tropical island, in an intense girl/girl romp that includes plenty of toys, a strap-on, toe and tit fucking, and anal explorations.
Annabel's next stop is at "ZE." Here, Jonathan again plays the lecherous boss (complete with Elvis wig and an infatuation with his own muscles) whose infamous "staff meetings" are as well-known as the tit job included with each contract. Then it gets strange: Annabel's second fantasy evolves into a slick sex scene where she is simultaneously screwed by two... aliens. From space; not the illegal variety! Fortunately, no baby monsters jump out of her stomach afterwards, but it is kinda hard to dismiss the wacky scenario of two creatures with realistic four-foot oval heads and white socks doing a d.p. on Miss Chong.
Annabel finally lowers herself to visit (gasp!) John T. Bone at Fantastic Pictures. This leads to her final and very colorfully costumed sequence where she is a high-wire artist who gets gang-banged by the entire circus clown section (led by Ron Jeremy, who at one point sticks his dick into a stuffed mountain lion's mouth). Plenty of anal, d.p., and even a triple penetration top off her flying trapeze act.
Loathe as I am to invoke the standard "you gotta see this for yourself" cliche, it fits all too well in this instance. This show's gonna be a hard one to top in the insanity section of your store.