Pay no attention to the box; these girls are not really that ugly. Not so you'll have nightmares, anyway. What they are, actually, are the kind of girls you'd meet strolling around any suburban or rural shopping center Sunday afternoon. They're chunky, they've got plain pusses, they're no beauty contestants.

But they are horny. And enthusiastic. Listen, a couple of them fuck Ron Jeremy, who requires at least four bags himself, in my book. But these gals get an A-plus for hardcore enthusiasm for their willingness to go along with anything.

Scene one holds out for a double penetration, and it's pretty hot — but I didn't appreciate the cruel conversation between the Ron and The Other Guy. Scene two features four workmen and two homely gals (one of them 50+ and particularly horny). They do it and do it and do it. Rather put me in mind of an old Mexican loop a cop showed me years ago. No animals, just an "Olè, let's party!" vibe. The third bit was riveting anthropology. Looks to be an Ed Powers outtake with a chick calling herself Christy Jism. She hides her face behind a Little Orphan Annie wig. She asks for a dildo "Mr. Ed size," and is obliged. Even an out-sized torpedo of a dildo gets lost up her twat — so she introduces it to her ass. Really, I never.

An unnerving police siren can be heard clearly in the background; you'd think they'd have edited it out of the tape. But this bit is so low rent, no one could be bothered. I dunno. It worked. It was part of the appeal.