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Released: Mar 01st, 1994
Running Time: 100
Director: Max Steiner
Company: Hot Cherry Studios
Cast: Dave Hardman, Umma, Max Steiner, Sally Layd, Tim Lake, Joey Verducci, Lacy Andrews
Critical Rating: AAA
Tim Lake is an interesting study in his own contrasts. He can look dorky or he can look Hollywood handsome. Tim's all-Hollywood in his role as the host of this, a takeoff of the cable series. But, whoever writes the enigmatic prattle that Tim mouths in the intros to the sex scenes, seems to be mainlining esoteric literature, recreationally. Some of Tim's palaver is as hard-to-swallow as a tarot card explanation manual.
However which way you modernize or package sex scenes, though, they still rise and fall according to set standards and practices. In which case, the material in this volume is blissfully average. The first of three vignettes — featuring Joey Verducci and busty Sally Layd — is ambitious in concept and almost dismissive in execution. Layd, a raspy blonde with a dockworker patois, cajoles a job-seeking Verducci into mounting her. The scene explores a variety of redundantly executed positions and ends up in an anal missionary which serves up no satisfactory penetration shot.
Max Steiner's scene with Umma, a voracious Oriental slut, on the other hand, is textbook anal at its best. After stalking her outdoors, Max takes her back to his place and begins spreading her muff wide enough to accomodate The Great Wall of China. Using his fingers in Umma's ass like Genghis Khan's advance scouts on the Manchurian frontier, Max follows up with an attack-retreat-attack pattern on her sphincter that is both authoritative and enormously satisfying to watch.
Unfortunately, the momentum doesn't carry over into the next scene between Lacy Andrews and Dave Hardman. Madeup to look like "Goodbye Mrs. Chips," Andrews plays an autumn-of-her-years school teacher to Hardman's student, but it's the cameraman that needs to go to class. Phantom insertions and way too much cable coverage describe this scene which suggests, because of the preponderance of soft angles, that Hardman didn't really live up to his name.
A potentially good series that needs to flag down a car before it lands in a road bed.