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Released: May 01st, 1987
Running Time: 75
Director: Ima Faux
Company: Essex Video
Cast: Patty Plenty, Billy Dee, Morgan Brittany, Carolyn Chambers, Frank James, Sabrina (I)
Critical Rating: A
Why, in a market screaming for originality, would a company (especially one like Essex) release a slap-dash title like Secrets Behind The Censored Door. This feature (originally titled Secrets Behind The Green Door) is nothing more than an attempt to capitalize on an established adult classic. There's even a starlet named Carolyn Chambers! And if they plastered "Censored" stickers over "Green" on the packaging for fear of a lawsuit(?), why didn't they edit all the references to the "green door" in the tape?
An off-screen narrator is the only source of continuity in this weak tape. When two people are done having sex, the narrator reiterates that the madam and whores who inhabit an old house stay young through "the powers behind the green door." And the "green door" isn't even green. It's glass with green smoke floating behind it. And the "power" is a glowing orb, which finds its way between the camera and the "action" on occasion.
But that's OK, because there's not much action anyway. Bad edits interrupt whatever sexual build-up gets started, and if somebody hits that gong one more time I'll go nuts! The best scene is a lesbian duet between two blondes in white lace, garters and stockings. The worst is an anal scene between Frank James and a brunette newcomer. His huge organ is obviously too painful for her, and she looks like she's considering a convent rather than face this again. If the performers aren't enjoying themselves, how can we? Even Jesse Easton takes things into his own hand, which is what I suggest you do if this tape is your only chance for sexual excitement.