It comes as no surprise that "The Professor" is a closet Star Trek nerd; as evidenced by the dubbed-in phaser sound effects that accompany Isis' vibratory stimulation session. The fact that she has to numb her senses with alcohol before bedding down with Elliot further proves the point.

Ginger, armed with more common sense, won't even let him near her pussy. Undaunted, Elliot hovers nearby, obliviously slapping his ham.

Before potential viewers can say "beam me the hell out of here," this Regan Senter wannabe proves his ineptitude with the basics of videography by repeatedly poking his fuzzy head into the frame while snapping stills. Elliot's tripod-happy compositions are rarely punctuated with closeups - even when he's not in the scene. Such activity requires a pinch of effort and creativity, which are clearly beyond his security-cam mentality. (Thus, a potentially arousing grope with Madeline and Damon is doomed before it begins.) What do you expect from a guy who doesn't even bother to list his own company in the credits?